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Be Encouraged

Questioning??

I wonder when people write in their blogs, does anyone really read them? Does it matter? Do we write just to get thoughts out? Bear our soul?  Don’t know…

What I do know right now, is how people fail.  When the person that fails you, is the one that is close to you, the pain is enormous.  You begin to question everything.  Wondering what is real and what is fake.  Are you the reason they failed, or are they, or is it both???

I do know that when the failure is as epic as saying you love someone and then are telling someone else the same-that failure is devastating.

What I’ve learned is, that kind of failure is not mine.

People will fail you – it’s a given. Yet I am not that failure. I will feel it, grieve the loss, and move on with the knowledge that God is and He’s got me through it all.

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The Remant

So I’ve had this realization lately and it’s this…many times in the Bible, God’s people went through very rough times.  Being held as slaves is one of the hardships that comes to mind, or how about being sought out by other nations around you-rough times.

There were those who cried out for God’s help -and yet time passed- without it.  I wondered how did they feel?  Did they wonder where God was, why was He delaying? I would guess some even walked away – in fact as I write I can say for certain that there  were some that did…read the book of Jeremiah, his mission was calling them back, warning them of dire circumstances.  Yes some returned, but not all.

I understand this, when life feels completely hard and without answers, it’s as if God is not listening, so why bother.  Why try?  Why keep going with the principles that seem to be making life harder as they require a higher way of walking/living.  I’ll tell you why-you, as a follower of Christ are part of The Remnant.  For it’s The Remnant that will eventually see the awesome move of God.

Imagine it: The Israelites were under Pharaoh, having to build bricks with little straw. They are being beaten, it’s hot, babies at home looking to you to provide…do you think they were not crying out to God for deliverance?  You know they were.  Now the day of deliverance had come.  It’s time to leave Egypt-the sheer amazement of this long awaited answer to prayer can almost paralyze you. You held on when it seemed impossible to do so, when all was dark, when your very soul ached, when tears where your food. The memory of life under bondage moves you on and out.  You go, grab those babies and your gone, for you are part of The Remnant.

The Remnant.  God still has a portion of people that are His to this day.  They cry out to Him in their own “Egypt”.  Longing for deliverance, watching as other around them are choosing to leave and make their own way.  Walking away -for their disappointment with God has not only blocked, that God is good, but it has also blocked their vision.  The subtle lies of the enemy-that God does not care, is not listening, and that He is not for them, off they go…

So what will you do- believer?  Will you go too? Will you stay, but be a bitter believer? OR, will you hold fast and not cast away your confidence.  Will you be one counted as part of The Remnant.  For know this believer, your day is coming-if not in this life-then for sure in the next.

As for me, though life at times rolls me down and I lie flat as a sheet of paper on a stone table-my spirit cries out BUT GOD!  He whispers and reminds me, I am His, He does hear me, and in due season I will reap…He then gently lifts me off the stone table, blows fresh life into me and sends me on to show – life can be lived – with joy even in the midst of trials because I am my beloved’s and He is mine, for I am part of The Remnant -how about you?

Without the Smell of Smoke

Have you ever sat around a camp fire? Maybe it’s a fire pit. It’s a fun thing to do (at least in my opinion) you usually are surrounded by friends and family. I know of the times it’s happened in my life there has been laughter, stories, songs, even some deep conversations.
You can roast marshmallows (by the way, I wonder who first thought of doing this?). You may even go so far as to take those roasted marshmallows and turn them into s’mores. Of all the different items that have been stated so far, you can partake in them or sit back and watch, but one thing you will not escape – is the smoke. If it’s not blowing on you at the moment, it will!
Three Hebrew boys knew about a fire, a hot fire-oh but wait I’m getting ahead of myself. The story of Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego is found in the book of Daniel. They were taken by the king’s command, but early on they had decided to not defile themselves-this choice began with them choosing to not eat the king’s food or drink his wine. So how did they end up facing a hot fire? Well we can see in Daniel 3:8 there were those who maliciously accused the Jews. They accused them of not serving the kings gods, by not worshiping them. But these three had made their stance, early on, no not at the moment the question was asked, but long before. They had made their stance to not bow before any other God – ever. When the edict went out that those who did not bow would be thrown into the furnace, their stance did not change, why? Because this was a conviction so deep in their soul that death would be the only thing that stopped it.
Why the short synopsis on these three young men, well I’ll tell you. As I have been walking through some tremendously difficult times-I began to feel like the heart-ache and hard times were never going to end. I didn’t know how to get out of the situation I was in? Then I heard the whisper of God-“without the smell of smoke.” I knew the story, knew how they came out of a tremendous trial and did so without even smelling of smoke!! What did that look like to me? How could I apply that to my life? What I didn’t know at the time I first heard this was this was going to be a way, a very apt way of beginning to renew my mind.
Every time the old circumstance would come back to mind I would say to myself “without the smell of smoke” and would turn my thoughts on the Word. I was then impressed to read Psalm 23. This Psalm has brought such healing to me. In my experience it has been a Psalm that is often used at funerals…I am not sure why because it has brought such life to me. I encourage you to slowly read it, let His word bring fresh life to you as well. Oft times when I would get to verse six “Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in the house of the LORD forever.” I would ask myself “Why?” and then go back to verse one and state because “The LORD is my shepherd…”
There is so much more that could be written-maybe someday, but I just wanted to put down in words that God is alive, willing to heal the inside where no one else sees but him. Granted others may see your actions and wonder why, but He knows why and is willing to heal and set a person free. There it is my reason for writing-freedom. I desire for all to know what He can do and that you do not have to be trapped in your circumstances-He is willing-for “He restores my soul”.

Selfishness

I have thought a lot about why people have affairs.  It is in the media, almost daily of some government official, or superstar who has been found to be having an affair.  And I wonder-if these so-called acts of love are (as they say) between two consenting adults, why are they kept secret?  Why all the lies and deception?  Why stay married which in and of itself implies to be monogamous, if you want to go sleep around?  Why involve the heart of another if you really don’t intend to divorce?  Why????? Selfishness.  If you thought about others, your spouse, family, co-workers (this is for the politicians), children would you really follow through?  I have had it with people who refuse to be an adult and take responsibility-GROW UP!!  If you want to mess up your own life that is your choice, but in this world we are all interconnected and what you do, how you live makes a difference.  So should anyone read this who is thinking of having an affair, or who is having an affair stop being so selfish and DO THE RIGHT THING.  Live a life that leaves good memories, laughter, joy and inspiration-we all will be better off.

Irony

Irony – English dictionary 1.  [uncountable] humor saying opposite of what you mean.  A form of humor in which you use words to express the opposite of what the words really mean “You’ve been so kind” she said, her voice heavy with irony.  2. [countable/uncountable] situation when opposite of expected happens.  A strange, funny, or sad situation in which things happen is the opposite way to what you would expect.  The irony is that it would have been faster to have taken the back roads after all.

This is how I would describe what happened this past summer, and I would lean more towards the second definition of the word. 

Where do I begin…

The home where I grew up had a few Aspen trees.  Over the years they either were cut down or got some type of disease, but I can remember one that stood tall in the back yard and I loved it.

So fast-forward to when we have our home, I asked for an Aspen tree.  I asked that it be planted outside our bedroom window so that when I sat in my room I could see it (which I can and it’s fabulous).

This past summer I went outside after work and was going to just relax on the deck.  As I sat in a chair I noticed the humming of bees, I looked around wondering where they were.  I looked up under the eve of our home, for in times past they have built their hives there, but there were none.  I wandered around letting my ear guide me to where they were and I saw them, lots of them all humming around my tree?  Why I wondered? 

It was at that moment that I noticed that our patio table was covered with sap and gunk.  All of a sudden I remembered a conversation I had with a lady at work.  She had told me about one of her trees having a type of disease.  She discovered this because they park their car under this tree and their cars window would be covered with the fecal matter that the little bugs were producing, along with the sap.  Gross I thought to myself, but as I stood there looking at my patio table I realized I had the same thing going on, oh appalling! 

But why the bees?

Well my little tree was producing sap like there was no tomorrow, or should I say trying to make it to tomorrow (further explanation to follow).  And all that sweet sap was like a neon light for insects, for not only were the bees having a hay day, but the sugar ants were rampant.  UGH!!!

I got the hose and my relaxing time was gone.  I washed down the table, chairs and as much of the deck as I could.  Then I moved everything out of the way of this mass sap producing tree.

When my husband came home, I in all my urgency told him “we need to do something to help my tree it has some kind of disease.”  Thankfully not to long later he found some type of what I will call “medicine” to help my tree.  Imagine my surprise when he mixed it with water and poured it at the base of the tree.  WHAT, you don’t spray it all over those nasty bugs, bees, ants???  No you apply the “medicine” to the roots.  I wondered if it would even work, but a few weeks later there were no more bees, no more nasty bugs, the sugar ants, well their another story.

My response, relief! My husband the hero, and you, you may have already figured where I’m going with this story.

Cut to October 17^th and as I was listening to Pastor Frank teach he said something to this essence that your roots should be deep in Christ and you need to be pulling from His resources, from Him and KABOOM.  I got the whole tree thing in one lump sum.  I heard God showing me so many things regarding this that my brain was having trouble taking it all in, here are a few.

Many times we attack problems that we have from the outside.  If we can just change the behavior or habit, say the right thing, look the right way, wear the right clothes, drive the right car, live in the right neighborhood, have the perfect job, get the perfect grade, have the best husband, boyfriend, girlfriend, etc.  I could go on and on but I’m sure you see the point.  We attack the nagging insects in our life from the outside.  Matthew 15:19 For out of the heart come evil thought, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false testimony, slander.  “Out of the heart” the inside.

In regards to the tree producing too much sap, I read that when a tree is sick it will do this in an attempt to heal itself.  What do we do?  What do we over-do?  Ouch.  Take a look at your life is there an area where you can see and possibly say “I am way too sappy here.”  This is not to say that we don’t need healing, for we do.  But it is to say how are we going about getting that healing?  What do you do to make yourself feel better, loved, worth it, special?  As I’m writing I have this sense that God is showing you what your insects are (poor self esteem, insecurities, etc.) and what you do trying to make them, yourself better.  He has a better way.

As a follower of Jesus Christ this is how I am to live… “having been firmly rooted and now being built up in Him and established in your faith, just as you were instructed, and overflowing with gratitude.” 1Col 2:7 I am to be pulling from my resource through the roots, pulling up the life and truth of the word, of my Savior.  This must be from the inside – out.

I love the scripture that says “His Divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness”2 Peter 1:3.  The Word of God, the life giving transforming, Word of God.  Apply the word to your roots, be rooted in the Word.  Pull up from this resource and let your insides be transformed.  No longer attacking those pesky insects from the outside, but taking care of it from the inside out.

May we be like the verse in Isaiah 55:12b “and all the trees of the field will clap their hands.”  Yes lets us clap our hands in adoration to the one who sets us free, free to be the people He has desired us to be.  FREE!

Forgiveness

In this journey of “Awakening” and staying awake I am discovering that forgiveness is vital.  I am attempting to be transparent here and this is not easy, but if I’m not real what’s the point, none of us need another opinion.  This is from something that God brought to light for me August 4, 2010.

Okay God, I have wondered and prayed, prayed and wondered, what is the tie that I feel in this awful situation that I am in.  Last night as I layed on the floor and I begged you for help and answers.  I said to You that this tie that I feel lingering on me, feels like a chain attached around my ankle, I see it, I want it off, but don’t know how to get it off.  It’s as if I come at it with a pair of scissors which do not work and this only frustrates me more.  In all sincerity I asked you to show me what it is – and I can clearly remember thinking this after I had asked You “do I really want to know?” and then hearing from You “do you really want to know?”  Feeling a little freaked out, I said yes…I am so desperate to know.

The next morning I am sharing this experience with my husband telling how badly I desire freedom and can’t seem to find it-frustrated.

I get to work and I can’t even say when it happened, but there was a knowing in my knower if what the stronghold was UNFORGIVENESS-UGHHH.  I was so disappointed, why?  Because I knew the person I was to forgive and I did not want to, and not only that I really didn’t feel like I knew how to forgive this.  After all the things I have had to work through and forgive this one feels like too much.

Don’t get me wrong I am very thankful to know what I am battling, and it makes perfect sense. I remembered a teaching that said when we are unforgiving it is as if we are carrying around a dead body on our back.  Oh yes this is the clamp I felt around my ankle.

Oh God how do I forgive this person? Knowing that my forgiving them does not matter at all to them.  I read a few articles on forgiving and some of them referred to you forgiving for the hopes of restoration, well this is not even an option, nor desire. 

Then there it is YOUR WORD, that says if you don’t forgive neither will I forgive you.  God it’s not that I don’t want to (maybe it is) it’s that I don’t know how?  How do I forgive someone who has no regard for me as a person/woman?  How do I forgive someone who has no regard for my family/marriage?  I don’t think they deserve it nor care, but I can see that it is totally blocking me.  HELP ME!!!!

As I continue reading articles  about forgiveness You remind me of what You have taught me about forgiveness and that is (when it’s a deep offense) it is done in layers, like an onion, smelly, stinky, a lot of crying but layer after layer you peel back and remove-eventually you will get to the core and be done with it.  So I need to do this, each time the pain floods over me “I forgive you”, every memory, every word, spoken, everything taken that was not yours, I choose to forgive.  I take you off of my hook, the hook of trying to make you responsible, my hook of wanting you to be sorry, my hook of thinking I can reason with you to do the right thing.  You are not going to humble yourself to me it’s just not going to happen, so I take you off of my hook and give you to God.  I place you on His hook (so to speak).  God, do I want you to do something – WELL YES – but at the same point I relinquish all my rights, thoughts, even desires.  You do what you want with this person, I let go I (oh God I don’t know if I mean it, I want too, for in doing this I am following Your principles/word and not mans) forgive. 

To forgive is: 1. to grant pardon for or remission of an offense, debt. 2. to give up all claim on account of. 3. to grant pardon to a person. 4. to cease to feel resentment against (this is not going to be easy.). 5. to cancel an indebtedness or liability.

So I forgive you ____________.

My goal is this life is to be like Jesus, and here the Father has given me an another opportunity to try, thank You Father.  It is not easy, but nonetheless YOU are worth it.

To be like Jesus

To be like Him

All I ask is to be like Him

All through life’s journey

From here to glory

All I ask is to be like HIM!

I am wide awake.

What do I do now?

Realizing my need for an awakening, what do I do now?  Well Pastor Frank answered that question.  Each of us at CBC were given a handout and for the next 50 days we were encouraged to read the scriptures and see what is God saying to us/me.  Each day there are several scriptures to read, you can do one, two or how ever many you feel. 

I am going to try to list a few things that I see. From 2 Chron. 14:2-7

I see that doing the good and right thing in God’s eyes includes (but is not limited too) removing false altars, gods, high places, sacred pillars, wooden images.  One of the best definitions I heard regarding idols was from Tony Evans he said “an idol is an unauthorized source that you go to, to meet your needs.”  I realize that for each individual this could look a little different, but I know that if it’s there in your life the Spirit of God will quicken you to see what it is.  When this has been dealt with I can then move on to the next portion and that is to seek His ways, for really how can I seek His ways and have all the other junk in the way?  When I seek God and His ways I have peace and am not at war with myself or with others.  Ahhh peace.   I am to build up my walls this to me is done by being in the Word, by allowing the truth in, by meditating on what He says, there is great protection in that.  

I can be extremely wordy so I will stop; but this is how we begin, by self-examination.  The plumb line has been set Amos 7:7-8. I am taking a look to see where I am in this process not for condemnation, but just the opposite FREEDOM.

How the journey started

This journey began in the third week of June, 2010. 

I listen to a radio program on the internet in the mornings as I get ready for work.  The program is by Tony Evans, he stated that he was going to start a new series called “Revive Us” and in all my foolishness I thought to myself “oh this will be interesting, I don’t really need it, but maybe I will later.”  Little did I know that later was two minutes away.

As he spoke I became acutely aware of my need for a personal revival, aware of how the hard trials of life had depleted me, so much so that I was not even aware of how low I was.  My heart and pride broke and I confessed my need of God to touch and restore me.  (By the way this is how revival always begins with confession, repentance.)

Oh but God being so good and merciful was not done, for in church that weekend Pastor Frank says that he is going to start a new summer series in July and it is going to be on “Alive-Reviving Spiritual Passion”.  God is amazing, yes amazing.  He did not let me dry up, yes I was liken to the valley of dry bones BUT the prophecy of His word comes forth and new life is stirring, I can feel it and it is GOOD!

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